How could this be happening to me?
I'm sitting on the sofa and I've got a cup of tea
The incessant beeping, it's getting really loud
I look out the window, oh god there's a crowd
Something must be happening they all look quite excited
But Darcy's woken from his coma, I'm not delighted! *
This better be important, there's programmes to be misssed
Unless this place is burning down I'm gonna be so pissed

I guess I'd better go outside and see whats going on
It was getting really boring till the firemen came along
They had a big red engine and a massive spouting hose
The sight of which inspired all the girls to drop their clothes
I don't know what it is about those funny little hats
All they seem to do is rescue fucking cats
They polish up their ladders and their fireman's pole
And rescue silly children who have fallen down a hole

Oh shit it's the fire alarm
But there's no smoke to make me cough
Oh shit it's the fire alarm
Won't someone turn it off?

So we stand around in crowds outside looking for someone to beat
And when we find him, we'll smash his face, and we'll kick him in the teeth
In case you're wondering who we've hit, I guess I'd better explain
It was the guy who said he started this, he'll shoulder all the blame

Oh shit it's the fire alarm
But there's no smoke to make me cough
Oh shit it's the fire alarm
Won't someone turn it off?

Oh shit it's the fire alarm
But there's no smoke to make me cough
Oh shit it's the fire alarm
Won't someone turn it off?

(J.T. Breakdown) **

Oh shit it's the fire alarm
But there's no smoke to make me cough
Oh shit it's the fire alarm
Won't someone turn it off?

(repeat to fade)

* A reference to popular australian soap "Neighbours"
** J.T. is regular Flat 29 collaborator Jenni Thornton. But in this case she is being a kind of Justin Timberlake character.